Archive for the ‘Interesting...’ Category
Another episode of funny forwards…
Did you ever notice…
- Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you’re wrong.
- I don’t understand the purpose of the line, “I don’t need to drink to have fun.” Great, no one does. But why start a fire with flint and
sticks when they’ve invented the lighter? - Have you ever been walking down the street and realized that you’re going in the complete opposite direction of where you are supposed to be going? But instead of just turning a 180 and walking back in the direction from which you came, you have to first do something like
check your watch or phone or make a grand arm gesture and mutter to yourself to ensure that no one in the surrounding area thinks you’re crazy by randomly switching directions on the sidewalk. - I totally take back all those times I didn’t want to nap when I was younger.
- The letters T and G are very close to each other on a keyboard. This recently became all too apparent to me and consequently I will
never be ending a work email with the phrase “Regards” again. - Do you remember when you were a kid, playing Nintendo and it wouldn’t work? You take the cartridge out, blow in it and that would
magically fix the problem. Every kid in America did that, but how did we all know how to fix the problem? There was no internet or message boards or FAQ’s. We just figured it out. Today’s kids are soft. - There is a great need for sarcasm font.
- Sometimes, I’ll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and suddenly realize I had no idea what the heck was going on when I first saw it.
- I think everyone has a movie that they love so much, it actually becomes stressful to watch it with other people. I’ll end up wasting
90 minutes shiftily glancing around to confirm that everyone’s laughing at the right parts, then making sure I laugh just a little
bit harder (and a millisecond earlier) to prove that I’m still the only one who really, really gets it. - How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?
- I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.
- I think part of a best friend’s job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.
- The only time I look forward to a red light is when I’m trying to finish a text.
- A recent study has shown that playing beer pong contributes to the spread of mono and the flu. Yeah, if you suck at it.
- Was learning cursive really necessary?
- Lol has gone from meaning, “laugh out loud” to “I have nothing else to say”.
- I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.
- Answering the same letter three times or more in a row on a Scantron test is absolutely petrifying.
- My brother’s Municipal League baseball team is named the Stepdads. Seeing as none of the guys on the team are actual stepdads, I inquired about the name. He explained, “Cuz we beat you, and you hate us.” Classy, bro.
- Whenever someone says “I’m not book smart, but I’m street smart”, all I hear is “I’m not real smart, but I’m imaginary smart”.
- How many times is it appropriate to say “What?” before you just nod and smile because you still didn’t hear what they said?
- Every time I have to spell a word over the phone using ‘as in’ examples, I will undoubtedly draw a blank and sound like a complete
idiot. Today I had to spell my boss’s last name to an attorney and said “Yes that’s G as in…(10 second lapse)..ummm….Goonies” - What would happen if I hired two private investigators to follow each other?
- While driving yesterday I saw a banana peel in the road and instinctively swerved to avoid it….thanks Mario Kart.
- MapQuest really needs to start their directions on #5. Pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.
- Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.
- I find it hard to believe there are actually people who get in the shower first and THEN turn on the water.
- Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.
- I can’t remember the last time I wasn’t at least kind of tired.
- Bad decisions make good stories
- Whenever I’m Facebook stalking someone and I find out that their profile is public I feel like a kid on Christmas morning who just got
the Red Ryder BB gun that I always wanted. 546 pictures? Don’t mind if I do! - Is it just me or do high school girls get sluttier & sluttier every year?
- If Carmen San Diego and Waldo ever got together, their offspring would probably just be completely invisible.
- Why is it that during an ice-breaker, when the whole room has to go around and say their name and where they are from, I get so incredibly nervous? Like I know my name, I know where I’m from, this shouldn’t be a problem….
- You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you’ve made up your mind that you just aren’t doing anything productive for the rest of the day.
- Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after DVDs? I don’t want to have to restart my collection.
- There’s no worse feeling than that millisecond you’re sure you are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.
- I’m always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten page research paper that I
swear I did not make any changes to. - “Do not machine wash or tumble dry” means I will never wash this ever.
- I hate being the one with the remote in a room full of people watching TV. There’s so much pressure. ‘I love this show, but will
they judge me if I keep it on? I bet everyone is wishing we weren’t watching this. It’s only a matter of time before they all get up and
leave the room. Will we still be friends after this?’ - I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello?Damnit!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and
goes to voicemail. What’d you do after I didn’t answer? Drop the phone and run away? - I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.
- When I meet a new girl, I’m terrified of mentioning something she hasn’t already told me but that I have learned from some light
internet stalking. - I like all of the music in my iTunes, except when it’s on shuffle, then I like about one in every fifteen songs in my iTunes.
- Why is a school zone 20 mph? That seems like the optimal cruising speed for pedophiles…
- As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
- Sometimes I’ll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.
- It should probably be called Unplanned Parenthood…
- I keep some people’s phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.
- I think that if, years down the road when I’m trying to have a kid, I find out that I’m sterile, most of my disappointment will stem from
the fact that I was not aware of my condition in college. - Even if I knew your social security number, I wouldn’t know what do to with it.
- Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey – but I’d bet my
ass everyone can find and push the Snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time every time… - My 4-year old son asked me in the car the other day “Dad what would happen if you ran over a ninja?” How the hell do I respond to that?
- It really pisses me off when I want to read a story on CNN.com and the link takes me to a video instead of text.
- I wonder if cops ever get pissed off at the fact that everyone they drive behind obeys the speed limit.
- I think the freezer deserves a light as well.
- I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lites than Kay.
- The other night I ordered takeout, and when I looked in the bag, saw they had included four sets of plastic silverware. In other words,
someone at the restaurant packed my order, took a second to think about it, and then estimated that there must be at least four people
eating to require such a large amount of food. Too bad I was eating by myself. There’s nothing like being made to feel like a fat bastard
before dinner.
Current Mood:
Amused &
Ja Ja Ja &
Naughty
Oops! There goes another rubber tree plant… or not!
The tyres of the future may be made from dandelions
Tremble, Michelin, tremble
OTHER than being an ingredient of the more recherché sorts of salad, herbal tea or wine, dandelions are pretty useless plants. Or, at least, they were. But one species, a Russian variety called Taraxacum kok-saghyz (TKS), may yet make the big time. It produces molecules of rubber in its sap and if two research programmes, one going on in Germany and one in America, come to fruition, it could supplement—or even replace—the traditional rubber tree, Hevea brasiliensis.
Despite the invention of synthetic rubbers, there is often no good substitute for the real thing, for nothing artificial yet matches natural rubber’s resilience and strength. This is because natural-rubber molecules, the product of a stepwise synthesis by enzymes, have a more regular structure than the artificial ones made by chemical engineering. Around a fifth of an average car tyre is therefore made of natural rubber. In an aeroplane tyre that figure can be more than four-fifths. Moreover, the price of synthetic rubber is tied to that of the oil from which it is made, rendering it vulnerable to changes in the oil price. Because oil is likely to become more costly in the future, natural rubber looks an attractive alternative from an economic point of view as well as an engineering one.
Natural rubber has problems, though. Growing Hevea in the Americas is hard. A disease called leaf blight means the trees have to be spaced widely. Even in Asia, currently blight-free, planting new rubber trees often means cutting down rainforest, to general disapproval. And trees, being large, take time to grow to the point where they can yield a crop. A smaller plant that could be harvested for its rubber therefore has obvious appeal.
To this end, Christian Schulze Gronover of the Fraunhofer Institute for Molecular Biology and Applied Ecology in Aachen, Germany, and his colleagues have identified the genes that allow TKS to produce usable rubber. In particular, they have discovered an enzyme called polyphenoloxidase that is responsible for making its rubbery sap coagulate.
From the plant’s point of view this coagulation is a good thing. The evolutionary purpose of rubber, and the reason why it has appeared independently in plants as diverse as trees, guayule and dandelions, is that it gums up the mouthparts of herbivorous insects. Human users, however, do not want it to coagulate too soon, and Dr Schulze Gronover has found a way to switch polyphenoloxidase off, using a technique called RNA interference. This intercepts and destroys the molecular messengers that carry instructions from the polyphenoloxidase gene to make the enzyme, meaning that rubber can be extracted more easily from the plant.
Meanwhile, in America Matthew Kleinhenz of Ohio State University is working on increasing the yield of rubber from TKS. Dr Kleinhenz is doing things the old-fashioned way, growing different strains of TKS, grinding up the roots (where most of the sap is found) to see which have the highest rubber content, and crossbreeding the winners. His aim is to create a plant that is both high-yielding and has roots chunky enough to be harvested mechanically by the sort of device now used to pick carrots.
Combining the two approaches—high-tech bioengineering and low-tech plant breeding—may produce that rarity in the modern world, a whole new crop species. It would also mark a step on a journey that some see as the way forward: a return to the use of plant-based products that have, briefly, been overshadowed by the transient availability of cheap oil.
Current Mood:
*Wink* &
Cool
Vocabulary you can *trust*
“Just because you’re paranoid doesn’t mean they’re not after you.” ~ Kurt Cobain
con?spir?a?cy??/k?n?sp?r?si/ [kuhn-spir-uh-see]
–noun, plural -cies.
1. the act of conspiring.
2. an evil, unlawful, treacherous, or surreptitious plan formulated in secret by two or more persons; plot.
3. a combination of persons for a secret, unlawful, or evil purpose: He joined the conspiracy to overthrow the government.
4. Law. an agreement by two or more persons to commit a crime, fraud, or other wrongful act.
5. any concurrence in action; combination in bringing about a given result.
Dictionary.com, “conspiracy,” in Dictionary.com Unabridged (v 1.1). Source location: Random House, Inc. http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/conspiracy. Available: http://dictionary.reference.com. Accessed: August 24, 2009.
Patternicity – The tendancy to find meaningful patterns in random noise.
Agenticity – The bent to believe the world is controlled bu invisible intentional agents.
Confirmation bias – which seeks and finds confirmatory evidence for what we already believe.
Hindsight bias – which tailors after-the-fact explainations to what we already know happened.
Scientific American, September 2009, “Paranoia Strikes Deep” by Michael Shermer, page 30
Current Mood:
Abducted
Seahorses are neat
Look, don’t touch! Help save the seahorses!
Click the pic for more kewl seahorse pictures!
Check out Project Seahorse and their sponsor (where I found out about this) GuyLian.
Current Mood:
Hey there! &
Seahorsey!
Mark the Date – Sept 10, 2008 – THE LARGE HADRON COLLIDER IS ONLINE
So the LHC went live today and the world did not get sucked into a black hole! (Like that was really gonna happen!) This is VERY COOL! I’m very excited to see what kind of data comes out of this over the next several months and years.
Go here for Beam events seen by the ATLAS detector.
AMAZINGLY SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES… (Thx, Rob)
AMAZINGLY SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES…
1. If you’re choking on an ice cube simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat. Presto! The blockage will instantly remove itself.
2. Avoid cutting yourself when slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold while you chop.
3. Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat by using the sink.
4. For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use a timer.
5. A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.
6. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives; then you’ll be afraid to cough.
7. You only need two tools in life – WD-40 and Duct Tape. If it doesn’t move and should, use the WD-40. If it shouldn’t move and does, use the duct tape.
8. Remember: Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.
9. If you can’t fix it with a hammer, you’ve got an electrical problem.
Daily Thought:
Some people are like slinkies. Not really good for anything but they bring a smile to your face when pushed down the stairs.
Warning to women….
THIS COULD HAPPEN TO YOU…..
IT COULD HAPPEN TO YOUR MOTHER …
OR TO YOUR SISTER!
The strangest thing happened to me at lunch today.
I was sitting at a local outdoor cafe having lunch by myself and two men came and sat down at my table…..
I gave them the death look, but they just casually stayed at my table and wouldn’t leave.
I shined up my ring on my married finger, then placed my hand on the table and I hinted to them that I was married and that I was not interested in them.
Luckily for me they got the hint and left, but thankfully the whole thing was captured on the Cafe’s camera.
I’m sending you this picture as a warning………….. just in case they try and pick you up too.
Honestly, some men think they are God’s gift.
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Then I fell out of bed and woke up!!!!!!
[thumb:109:l:s=0:l=x:t=LMAO] Got this in an e-mail from a girlfriend and thought it was pretty funny!
This Week in God – Janus
"My thoughts... Perhaps we should call on Janus to intercede
in the war and to help us start a fresh new year.“
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Origin
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Roman. God of passage.
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Known period of worship
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circa 400 BC to circa 400 AD. | |
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Synonyms
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Ianus | |
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Center(s) of cult
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many sanctuaries throughout Italy, including the celebrated Janus Quadrifons temple (not extant). | |
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Art references
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sculptures and relief carvings. | |
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Literary sources
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Aeneid (Virgil). | |
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Janus is generally known as the “god with two faces” and is the deity responsible for gates, doorways and of all beginnings. He is also specifically a benign intercessor in times of war. He has no Greek counterpart but is the god of past, present and future. According to legend the son of Apollo, born in Thessaly, he founded the city of Janiculum on the Tiber. Janus is depicted with two faces turned in opposite directions, symbolizing his dominance over past and future. He holds a key in his right hand and a staff in his left when invoked as guardian of a gate or roadway; alternatively he holds the numbers 300 and 65 when presiding over the start of a new year. He is also equated with the rising and setting of the sun. Each, new season, and the dawn of each day was sacred to Janus. He was particularly celebrated at New Year and the month name January is derivative. The Janus Quadrifons temple was reputedly a perfectly symmetrical square, each side possessing one door representing each of the four seasons, and three windows collectively comprising the twelve months of the year. |
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Reference: Encyclopedia of Gods
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Other info: Encyclopedia Mythica Wikipedia The Aeneid (Penguin Classics)






